This week, I received a text message that caught me completely off guard. Several months ago, I recruited a candidate for an executive-level position. We spent a lot of time talking about his career, his goals, what success looked like to him, and where he hoped his next chapter would take him. He was an excellent candidate, and I believed he was worth serious consideration.
In the end, he did not get the job. Like most recruiting processes, life moved on. Another search. Another conversation. Another opportunity. Or so I thought.
Then my phone buzzed.
His message was simple. He told me he felt compelled to reach out. He was not exactly sure why, but as he found himself looking for another opportunity, I was the first person he thought to contact.
I will be honest. That meant more to me than if he had accepted the original position.
It reminded me that people do not always remember the outcome. They remember the experience.
I have been reading John Maxwell’s The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership, and one idea has stayed with me all week. Leadership is influence. The more I thought about it, the more I realized influence is not measured by how many people say yes to you. It is measured by whether people trust you enough to come back when they need you.
That does not happen because of one great conversation. It happens because of dozens of small moments. Listening instead of rushing. Being honest instead of telling people what they want to hear. Treating someone with dignity, even when the answer is no. Following through on what you said you would do.
Those moments do not always feel significant while they are happening, but they add up. Over time, they become your reputation.
I think that is true far beyond recruiting. As leaders, people remember how we made them feel. As parents, our children remember whether we were present. As friends, people remember who showed up when life became difficult. As Christians, people often remember our actions long before they remember our words.
That is what challenged me this week. Maybe influence is not built during the big moments. Maybe it is built in the ordinary conversations that seem too small to matter.
Then one day, someone reaches out. Not because you have all the answers. Not because you can solve every problem. But because they trust you.
That kind of trust cannot be demanded. It cannot be bought. It cannot be assigned with a title. It has to be earned.
One conversation at a time.
Goals are seasonal. Growth is the journey.
Relationships are the legacy we leave behind.